Monday, February 05, 2007

Febrrrrrruary the 5th

You know, the nice thing about cold weather is that it really brings people together. There are few other weather conditions that have the same effect. Rain bums people out, as do humid days, dreary autumn days and so on. But cold weather really gets people to unite against a common enemy, especially days like today when it's 2 degrees F.

It could be that when it's wicked cold, it's also sunny which has an uplifting effect on people. I don't think we'll get to the bottom of this here today, and for now I have some other matters to discuss.


A Skier's Paradise

Friday night started out like it was going to be one of those nights. I was sitting in my recliner, balled up under a blanket watching blah programming. In an attempt to both kill the malaise and warm my bones, I decided to do a little ab workout. I brought the ol' fitness ball into the livingroom, and flipped through the channels in search of something interesting to look at but not necessarily listen to. Jay-Z would provide my fitness soundtrack for the evening.

Wouldn't you know, I stumbled upon Friday Night Fights on ESPN (I or II, I'm not sure). Nothing gets me excited for exercising like seeing people beating the shit out of each other. COPS! would also have worked.

Anyway, I got to working on the ol' abs and really got into some o-other-shit. All of a sudden I hear a noise I hadn't heard in a long time - a shovel. I looked out the window and saw that not only had it been snowing, but it was really coming down and accumulating. That settled it, I was going skiing. I gathered my xc ski equipment from the basement, scooped the dead spiders from the boots and got myself prepped to ski.

It was a balmy 37 degrees out, so I was sure to be sweating in no time. I figured I'd ski for a half hour or so, just to say I did, but once I got out there I couldn't stop. As it turns out, I really enjoy xc skiing. The best part was, after an hour and a half, as I packed up my car the wind picked up and it became quite blustery. I finished up just in the nick of time. I also made plans to ski at Notchview in the morning.

I'll be brief with my Notchview review. The place was empty when we got up there, I think mine was the third car in the lot. We grabbed our tickets, suited up and hit the trails. The nice place about Notchview is that they groom the trails. For those of us who are less than nimble on narrow, edgeless skis, groomed trails are the bees knees. This was my first foray into the world of groomed grails and I give it two thumbs up.


This section brought to you by
Prescription for Old Age

It was early on Saturday night when I was leaving The Heritage with the 'COWs. HECOW says something about how we should be doing something, implying that the night was still young. ECOW tells him that it was actually almost 11:00 PM, to which HECOW replies "Quick, gimme 20 cc's of Barcalounger. STAT!"

At that point, I almost flew off the road. I didn't know what a barcalounger was, but A. it sounded funny, and B. I assumed it was a recliner of some sort. The recliner image in my mind then made it more ridiculous because how would one get 20cc's of a recliner into his/her system? Genius, pure genius.




Round Up!

Another gem from Saturday night includes a tale of beautiful women in a towny bar. We walked into The Heritage, and into a sea of well-dressed women doing shots. CHA-CHING! The place was so thick with attractive women I didn't even know what to do with myself. We grabbed some drinks (a Diet Coke for yours truly) and started working on our plan to get control of the pool table. No sooner did our drinks arrive then we hear one of the girls holler "Alright ladies, let's go!" That was that, they all filed out of the bar and into their awaiting bus. After that it was nothing but hoochies and drunk guys. Boooorrrriiiiinnnnggggg.


Mortgage Update

I gave my co-owner until Friday to put her one signature on the one piece of paper, and the paper back in the mail in the pre-addressed, pre-stamped envelope. This is after a month of repeatedly asking her to sign it. This is her definition of full cooperation.

Prior to last week I hesitated to give a deadline because I knew if I said to have it back to me by, say, the 15th, she'd wait until the 15th to start working on finding a pen. Instead I told her to have it back as soon as possible, and I impressed upon her that she was holding up the whole thing and that time was of the essence. Weeks passed and I was forced to write back and basically say "Sign it and get it back in the mail no later than Friday. I'd also like you to let me know when it's in the mail so I can give my attorney a head's up."

Saturday afternoon I had still not heard a peep. A follow-up e-mail has been ignored, and I'm afraid I'll have to call her to remind her. ONE FUCKING SIGNATURE! WHAT IS THE BIG DEAL!?



Over and Out,
Old Coot

1 comment:

Abbey said...

I think of Barcalounger as the Lark of the recliner world - like you might see a cheesy commercial with old people feeling good about themselves while sitting in it.

"Something inside of me just said 'Hey, wait a minute, I want to beat him.' and I just took off." -Pre