Off the Dome

I've been trying to keep posting on a regular basis. Over the weekend I spent hours writing, but then pulled the plug at the last minute when I deemed my monologues unworthy. Instead of talking about what I've been doing, I'm just going to put down some thoughts I've been having lately.

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Feel-Good Lyrics Pop Quiz

There are some songs in regular rotation in my living room and in my head, songs that just plain make me feel good. Below you'll find a few lyrical selections from those songs (I, II, III). Below those you'll find the artists (A, B, C). See if you can match them up correctly. Since this won't be graded, don't cheat and look up the answers on Google.

I

The Good Life.
Let's go on a livin spree.
Shit, they say the best things in life are free.
The Good Life.

Sorry, this one doesn't look as good on paper as it does on the airwaves.

II

The telephone's singing, ringin'
it's too early don't pick it up.
We don't need to,
we got everything we need right here,
and everything we need is enough.
It's just so easy when the whole world fits inside of your arms.
Do we really need to pay attention to the alarm?
Wake up slow, mmm mmm, wake up slow.

III

Fuck you too, bitch.
Call the cops.
Ima kill you and them loud ass mothafuckin' barkin' dogs.

Okay, this one is not a feel-good lyric at all, but I hate loud ass mothafuckin' barkin' dogs. In fact, whenever I hear a dog barking incessantly (which is often) that line runs through my head over and over.

Artists:
A. Eminem
B. Jack Johnson
C. Kanye West

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Lost Meanings

You know how old people are so worried that today's youth won't know how to tell time on an analog clock? If their fears are correct, in a short while when you yell "Zombie at Five O'Clock!" the kid won't know where to shoot. He'll be so busy digging his mobile phone out of his pocket he'll probably barely even notice that his flesh is being torn from his body.

Some additional phrases in danger of losing their meaning include:

• Dial a Phone
• Tapping your wrist to silently ask someone the time (no, not a phrase but if people use the clocks on their cell phones they won't know what that motion means)
• Area codes - meaningless these days. Phone numbers will soon just be 10 digits with the first three loosely identifying the region of the country where someone resides
• Rewind - No tapes to rewind. Hell, even CDs are on their way out. You can't rewind a Flash drive. Now the term is "back that up", as in "Yo son, that was tight. Back that up." Remember "Be Kind, Rewind"?
  
• Cigarette Break (AKA Smoke Break) - This one I'm trying to keep alive, but with a different meaning. I take smoke breaks but just walk around outside to clear my head.
• Turn Signal - Use it or lose it.
• Common Cold - Nobody just gets sick anymore, we have super viruses now.
• Responsibility - Think about it, this is a do what you want and someone else will cover you society.

Sorry, this list got a little lame on me. I had a real reason for starting it, but nowadays it's taking me several days to put together a posting.

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That's it. I'll holler at y'all later.


Over and Out,
Old Coot