Oooookaaaay. I’ve been trying for a few days now to get a posting up there for all y’all to read. The first time, it barfed on the save and I lost my post. Then it straight up told me that I couldn’t do anything. I’m trying my damndest to get the info out there that you need to live a full life.
I’ve also had complaints that the font is too big. We have our top engineer working on the problem right now. Actually, since this blog is manned by only me - who happens to be an engineer – you are in good hands. I may not be a software engineer, computer scientist or even a data entry specialist, but I have heart. So I’ll be bummed out day in and day out until this problem is alleviated. It appears that it only happens to readers using Firefox, which I understand is becoming a popular web browser. We here at Old Coot Enterprises™ don’t wish to alienate any of our readers regardless of race, creed, income, web browser preferences, or favorite ice cream topping.
And that’s all I have for today. Hold tight, help is on its way.
Over and out,Old Coot
Monday, March 13, 2006
Help is on its way
Monday, March 06, 2006
Another Video Blog
Sorry to bombard you with video blogs, but this one is worth posting. As an avid The Simpsons fan since it's creating back in the mid 90's, I feel I should share this with my regular readers. Enjoy
Primed, Retied and Full of Swine
Weekend Update!!!
Well, I got the kitchen all primed up and ready to go. You'll all be happy to know that I opted for a warm green (tough to explain) color, inspired by the packaging on an old bottle of imported gin I had laying around. It also seems to be the same color as my small plates, oops. I forgot I signed up to give blood tonight, so I'm not sure whether I'll get to painting tonight or not. I had planned on leaving work early to do that but A) I have to give blood and B) I got into work late. Tee hee.
I'm sure anyone who's been around me in the last month has heard me bitch about my foot being sore (as hell). I read an illustrated article about shoe tying/lacing techniques that people use to alleviate problems they may be having. Lo and behold, one of them seems to have solved mine. I was thinking surgery, orthotics, complaining, etc was the route to go, but a simple adjustment in my lacing technique and I'm back on top. Two long weekend trail runs with ZERO problems.
PlacaTAN!
Hmm, what else is new? Oh, interesting stories about running this weekend. You may all find these droll, but they were funny to me at the time so you have to listen.
NUMBER 1:
One of the main dudes in the group in which I run - named 'Bad Jim' - is the leader in that he always leads the runs. He knows every trail backwards and forwards, which is mind boggling to me. Yesterday I was up in the front of the pack running with BJ and he started to veer over towards a trail. I pulled the old "follow from the front" maneuver, where I'm not really leading, I'm just in the front. Someone comments "Oh, Todd's leading us today?" to which I responded "Nope, just in the front. As soon as I don't hear voices I'll know I should have turned."
Eeeerronnngg.
We get to a fork in the path and I stop to wait for directions. BJ starts grilling me "Where do we go? Go ahead (in a condescending BJ way), pick a direction." Don't get me wrong, he was busting my balls, not being as ass. I reinforced my position as follower and he offered to "take over from here". At which point, we turned around and headed back from whence we came. The entire time I was in front, I was going the wrong way. Most everyone knew it but they let me lead for the sole purpose of being able to bust on me about it afterwards. Jerks!
NUMBER 2:
Sunday was the birthday of one of the women in the group. In celebration we took her out to breakfast at Bob's Country Kitchen (mmm MMMM, bitch). After receiving her cards and gifts, she hit the bricks. Those who remained dined on the finest country cooking this side of the Housatonic. Following BJ's lead, I opted for the Farmer's Omelet. To those of you unfamiliar with such an omelet, it's also called a Garbage Omelet, and consists of whatever the cook feels like putting in it. After explaining to the waitress that we've ordered this before, she seemed content and left.
Minutes later, the cook came over to ask about the FO. Here's how the conversation went...
Cook: Did you order the Farmer's Omelet?
BJ: Yeah.
Cook: What's in that? I've never heard of it.
BJ: I think you guys call it the garbage omelet. It's whatever you feel like putting in it.
Cook (not grasping that it's the cook's choice): OK. So what do you want in it?
BJ: Whatever you'd like to put in it.
Cook (seemingly confused): You want bacon, ham, sausage?
BJ: Sure, whatever you want to add.
Cook (still confused): Does it have veggies?
BJ: Okay. Anything you like.
Cook: Meat and veggies, just meat or just veggies?
BJ: Yes.
Cook: Cheese?
BJ: It could, sure. Whatever you want to put in it.
The cook leaves and seems to understand. When the waitress comes over with our orders, the omelets are ENORMOUS. The cook put a lot of everything in them, so much that the eggs didn't wrap all the way around the fillings. Hasidic Jews and the Nation of Islam were outside protesting the gross quantity of swine in these omelets, on the Sabbath no less!!
Neither of us could finish the meals, but Oh My God did it taste good. Note to self, just get the pancakes next time.
Well sweet readers, I'm done. There's surely more to tell but this should hold you until next time.
Over and Out,
Old Coot
Thursday, March 02, 2006
I'm cleanin out my closet
Dear readers, let me tell you that you've been doing a hell of a job lately. [Pat on back] Hell of a job! [/Pat on back]
Yesterday on the way home from work, I took the long cut. I left work early to prime the kitchen, but it was such a nice day I drove around a little. As I passed the little plaza on Williams St., I thought to myself "Self, one day you need to go into that credit union and close out your accounts". I have at least one joint account from when the ex g/f worked there and we were saving for a vacation. Since then, I haven't touched it and all it does is serve as an unwelcome reminder via monthly statements. It's bad enough that the mortgage is still half in her name, but this is something I can easily remedy. So I whipped the car around and went in.
After closing the account withdrawing the remaining $39.46 (which I am not going to share with her), the woman had to ask if we were still together. I shut her up with a quick "No", answering her question and sending the message that I didn't wish to continue with that conversation.
Once I got home, I got to work taking down items from the kitchen walls. I pulled the appliances away from the wall and wiped any food materials from the walls and ceiling. Really, how the hell do you get splatters on the ceiling? This painting project is another part of my "cleaning out my closet" program, since the aformentioned ex picked the color and painted it. I don't want to give anyone the impression that I'm bitter, I just want to make the place "mine".
While moving things, I came across a few items tucked here and there that don't belong to me. I know they are of sentimental value to their true owner, and since I had also just recently come across said person's Birth Certificate while scouring the place for my own (which I did not find). I felt I should do the right thing and at least make an attempt to return these items. So when I ran to The Home Despot for more primer, I swung by her folk's house to drop the stuff off. You'd think after a couple of years I'd have gotten rid of all this stuff, but I hadn't, and the constant reminders were seriously messing up my chi. How can the SUMMER OF TODD reach its full potential with all the negative chi laying around my estate? I could have junked it all, but A) that's bad kharma, B) I'm too nice of a guy and C) I get along well with her parents and they love when I stop over (is that wrong?).
In short, I feel like I did some real "closet cleaning" last night. I closed out some open action items, primed the kitchen (afirst step towards purging my kitchen of that bad chi), then capped the night with a viewing of "8 Mile" starring my favorite rapper Eminem. Nobody else likes that movie, so when I'm alone I kick back and crank the fucker up.
Then after showering, I walked through the house naked just because I could. It felt very liberating, I think I might do more of it. I apologize now to any neighbors who might have a view of any of my many uncovered windows.
Throwing everything to the wind,
Old Coot
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
THE SUMMER OF TODD is upon us
Sup mangs (and wo-mangs). Today is another fine day in the life of yours truly. The sun is shining, the thermometer has broken back into double digits and I have a piping hot bowl of oat bran in front of me. So piping in fact, that it melted the first spoon I used. But that is neither here nor there.
Last night I made a delicious chocolate cake with delicious chocolate frosting. Both were homemade of course, and I enjoyed a nice fat slice of it aroun 8:00 in the PM (and again around 11:00). Of course, my stomach was unhappy this morning but I'll get by.
But the topic of today's discussion isn't cake and it isn't oat bran. I'm writing to announce that this summer, the summer of '06 is going to be THE SUMMER OF TODD! Yes, Old Coot is a psuedonym; my real name is Todd. I declared back in '01 that that was going to be THE SUMMER OF TODD, and it was in fact a glorious summer. I couldn't have asked for a better summer back then. Since then, the summers have been less than ideal, and I don't like to think that my life peaked at age 22.
Now, after a couple of years of hard work reformatting my life I am ready to start anew. I've put in some real hours redefining myself in all aspects, and I'm going to reap the benefits this summer! Some of the wheels have already been put in motion, and things are starting to fall into place so be prepared. I can't get into the finer details at the moment due to my varied readership, but rest assured good things are coming my way. Even my horoscope has hinted at some very promising developments.
P.S. Nobody tell ECOW or HECOW about the cake. That is on the DL.
Over and out,
Old Coot
